Heading south… All the way to Portland. I have made a few quick excursions to the lovely city to the south but haven’t truly spent much time there. I am heading down at the beginning of next week to explore for a few days and visit with my friend, the exceptionally delicious, Poppy Black.

This all began at the behest of a potential client. He resides in Portland but saw my ad, read my website, and decided we had to meet. Thusly, I was enticed to head on down to visit the city of strip clubs, craft cocktails, and food trucks. While I will only be there for a few days, I hope to pack in as much sight-seeing, strip clubbing, and food trucking (is food trucking an actual phrase?!?) as possible. Please email me with suggestions, tips, and advice. With limited time, I want to ensure I hit the best spots!

Knock, knock, 30? It’s me, Sol, and I’m just itching to come in. Only one more year in my 20s! I have always liked the saying: “Do no regret getting older. It is a privilege denied to many.” And it’s very true.

I can honestly say that being 19-, 20-, 21-years old was enjoyable. But I can also honestly say that I wouldn’t want to go back. The life experiences, knowledge, and whatever miniscule amount of wisdom I have accrued in the ensuing years has proven wonderful. The maturity that only comes with years is truly priceless. Instead of dreading the future, I look forward to it. So many amazing things have happened in my life that I feel as though it is only a hint of what’s to come.

Many people have asked me what I would like for birthday gifts. And I feel awkward answering this question. I know many providers have entire pages dedicated to gifts, however, this is not something I am really comfortable with… in response to the people that have asked, I have created two wish lists both under Sol Finer. One is at Amazon (www.amazon.com) and the other is at Net-A-Port (www.net-a-porter.com). It’s weird because the best gifts I have received have been visits from you. Yes, you. And if I haven’t met you yet, then a visit from you would be something I would treasure. Really. While a shirt or a candle would be nice, spending time with the people in my life I have come to adore is actually priceless.

Having said this, there is one other thing that is incredibly important to me. Strangely, I never set out to be an activist. But I have now been involved with the Seattle chapter of SWOP (http://swop-seattle.org/) for several months. A donation to SWOP would be incredible. Or, even more so, a donation to SASS (www.Seattle-SASS.org). SASS is the first Seattle Annual Sex Work Symposium. There has been so much press recently (something I touched upon in a recent post) about sex workers. While some of it has been positive, the press has gone hand-in-hand with a tremendous push by the Seattle PD to crack down on sex workers. There was actually an article where a police officer stated there was no such thing as a “happy hooker.” SASS sets out to debunk this myth. There are many, many providers who are independent, work of their own volition, make a reasonable income – on which they pay taxes like everyone else, and simply find the idea they are a victim absurd. Someone like, say, me who are pushed into silence under the very real threat of legal retaliation.

I find the idea that there are women being forced to work against their will abhorrent. The same with underage girls. The same with trafficked women. But there is a clear line of demarcation between these actual victims and providers, like myself, who see this as a job that has flexible hours, incredible co-workers, and great benefits. So if you’d like to do something for me for my birthday, donate to SASS. It is time to educate people unfamiliar with the hobby and let our voices be heard. We are an incredibly diverse group of women, men, transsexuals, camgirls/guys, phone sex operators, pro dommes, foot fetishists….We are black, we are white, we are both, we are Asian, we are married, we are single, we are poly, we are gay/straight/both, we are ivy-league educated, we are high school dropouts, we are mothers/fathers/grandparents, we are members of the PTA, we are soccer coaches. We are providers. And it is time to hear our truth.

It’s been a long time coming… but we’re moved. As many of you know, I share an incall with two absolutely lovely ladies: Jackie Fine and Lauren Love. And, after a rather arduous search, we have found a fantastic new incall. There are a couple of pros and several cons to our former incall. Among the pros: the location and the complete lack of concern/interest at pretty much any activity from the neighbors. The con list is a bit more lengthy: parking is difficult, the exterior of the building is a disaster and even the entryway and stairs are not maintained, the property management company is a nightmare… I could go on.

The question everyone is asking is, of course, where did we go? And the answer is (drumroll please): Capitol Hill!! Yup. We have moved approximately 1/2 mile away. Technically we are on the border of Cap Hill and the CD. It seems we are too Capitol Hill to be the actual Central District but some people call the area Mount Baker but even then we are still on the Cap Hill side of what would be Mt. Baker… oh man!! The multitude of neighborhoods in Seattle makes my head spin!! Regardless of what it is called, our new location has many wonderful amenities not the least of which is ample (well, ample for Capitol Hill) free street parking.

Our super swank new digs include: hardwood floors, washer/dryer in the townhouse, a patio and square footage that is roughly three times the size of the old space. Oh, and the landlord is super, super awesome! The dearth of crazy people rocking themselves in the fetal position on the front steps is just the cherry on top.

Just last week I returned from a near two-week trip back east. It was wonderful. I got to see friends and family. I got to travel with friends (Avani Faye and Chloe May were my delightful travel companions for this adventure). I got to work in cities that I have never previously worked in.

The majority of my time was spent in New York City. I stayed at a marvelous midtown hotel that a client had recommended: Radio City Apartments. For providers out there, normally when travelling I use airbnb, but in NYC, this place was perfect. It was like it was made for providers. The room I had was actually an apartment with a kitchen, dining and seating areas, large bathroom, and a separate bedroom. The hotel is super high volume and there is no late-night guest check-in. There are also not cameras in the halls. Like I said, made for providers! One feature that proved helpful is that it is fully handicapped accessible. Which turned out to be useful as I had one client in a wheelchair (Hi C.!! It was an absolute pleasure!).

It wasn’t all work and no play either. Chloe and I went to see the Book of Mormon on Broadway – hysterical and highly recommended! One afternoon I wandered down to the Math Museum (MoMath). Make jokes at your leisure about how I go to museums devoted to math in my free time. In large part it is geared to kids. However, there were some incredibly interesting and complex exhibits. The curators did a phenomenal job making these interesting and understandable. Let’s be real, it is not an easy feat to make math exciting! I would, in all sincerity, recommend checking it out. Since I have a wild side too(!), Avani and I hit Rick’s Cabaret to check out New York’s lovely ladies. We also crashed a very posh, private party on the rooftop nightclub of a very fancy hotel.

Alas all fun must come to an end. Thankfully I went out with a bang! My last night in NYC a couple sent car service to take me ~20 minutes outside the city to meet them at their lovely home for a threesome. I was a bit nervous not knowing what to expect… I shouldn’t have been. The gorgeous woman that opened the door had my head spinning with a hello kiss. Needless to say, the night was amazing. After that, it was back to the hotel to pack and off to the airport the next morning. It is always fun to get away but it took this trip to make me realize that I have truly come to think of Seattle as home.

There’s a male escort that writes a humorous blog that I often read. One of his more recent posts was about the various things people email or say to him that are awkward. As he is a gay male escort, a number of the more frequent verbal volleys were definitely outside my sphere of reference However, there was a bit of overlap. It prompted me to come up with my own list of frequent yet odd things people email or say to me.

For example, the emails that say: Hi.
Don’t do this. It tells me nothing – except that you are most likely wasting my time. Do send me an email that includes your name, a little about yourself, a proposed date/time for our meeting and a couple of references. If you do this, it lets me know immediately that you are serious about setting up some time. It also expedites the process of getting in to see me. If you send such an email, I can check your references and get back to you potentially allowing the entire intro/screening/logistics process to be completed in two emails.

Don’t send me a dick pic. Why one would send me such a photo is absolutely baffling. Is there really a contingent of men that believe providers are just sitting at their computers waiting to receive photos of their genitalia? If so, please allow me disabuse you of this notion.

Another frequent question is: why don’t you show your face? I can assure you that it is not because I am hideously ugly. I am a grad student at UW. I do not send face pictures to random strangers – no matter how much you assure me that you won’t share them. I don’t know you. And until we have an established relationship, this is simply not going to happen. Just as you value your privacy, I value mine. If you’d like to see my face, schedule an appointment and come on by!

Mu favorite: been busy today? So open-ended… so awkward… So open to interpretation! While from some it is clearly meant in a pejorative way, from others it is less clear. This is a particularly strange question for me as I am always very clear that as a low-volume provider I never see more than one client in a day. Thus when asked this question, I wonder… do you really want to hear about how I spent three hours searching the online archives of the British Library for an obscure citation…?

There are surely more quirks that I am forgetting so I will call this part one. Ladies – email me if you have additions to this list.

In perusing the Economist online the other day, I was more than a little surprised to see an article entitled, “Prostitution, A Personal Choice”(http://www.economist.com/news/leaders/21611063-internet-making-buying-and-selling-sex-easier-and-safer-governments-should-stop#). As anyone that reads the Economist will know, this is not this magazine’s typical reading fare. Further surprising was the stance the author took in analyzing the internet’s influence on the industry and flat out endorsing full decriminalization of prostitution.

This is supposition on my part but I believe the recent attention from the media to prostitution is due in large part to the book Superfreakonomics. The book includes a case study on the economics of prostitution since the advent of the internet. Naturally the media, being the media, has latched onto this as a sensationalist topic and it is mentioned in nearly every interview I have seen with the authors. Stemming from this attention to the business, news organizations are examining prostitution in a more analytical light. Of course not all the coverage is positive and some of it is simple regurgitation of the social stigmas that have been perpetuated for years (whores = crack addicts, prostitutes = controlled by abusive pimps, etc.). It is refreshing to see the Economist take a non-traditional stance and actually look at the industry as an actual business – just like myself and most of my colleagues do. In doing so, they acknowledge that in criminalizing sex for money, governments are increasing the odds that rapes, assaults or other acts of violence will go unreported. With the integration of the internet in the business, prostitution is becoming more available to more people in a dramatic way. By decriminalizing it, governments would not only gain revenue from the men and women working in the industry, they would also allow for safer work environments and better protection for both providers and clients.

As a note, being that prostitution is still illegal in the state of Washington, I would like to be clear that I am not a prostitute. I have not and never will accept money for sex. As one provider in a documentary I saw memorably put it: You buy my time. The sex is free.

As a child I frequently dreamed of having super powers – I wanted to breathe underwater. I wanted to fly. I wanted to be psychic. And while many of my dreams came true (kayaking Midland Sound at dawn, going to Harvard, I could go on!), I never gained a super power. Stay with me here, I’m going somewhere with this!

The other day I had a client that, at the end of our time together, said, “WOW, that was amazing. I had such a wonderful time. The only thing is, I wish you had…” Here’s my point: I’m not psychic. More than anything else, I want your time with me to be everything you desire. If you would like more of something, less of something else, would like play out a secret fantasy you have harbored since your teens – communicate with me!

I always tell people when they enter my incall, their stress, anxiety, unhappiness, drama, etc. gets left at the door. All that baggage will still be there should you choose to pick it up on your way out. However within the confines of this space, there is no drama, no judgment, no social stigmas to hold you back… It is all about wish fulfillment and making fantasies come to life. The critical point here is communication. If you don’t tell me what you want, chances are, I’m not going to magically figure it out.

My entry into this industry was not fueled by avarice. It was a conscientious decision to do something I enjoyed and that allowed to me make other people happy. I relish the pleasure that my clients feel. It brings me a satisfaction like no other. The only way I can make your dreams come true is if you share them to me.

This is, for better or worse, an ephemeral business. Girls come and go all the time. Girls travel. Girls retire. Then un-retire. It is an aspect of the business that just… is. Another aspect, again, for better or worse, is drugs. The prevalence of drug use among pros is sadly quite high (…pun not intended). In my experience, usage runs the gamut. There are casual pot smokers to girls that work solely to support their habits. As someone that doesn’t drink alcohol and doesn’t do any drugs, I don’t have a strong grasp on the “whys” of using. I just know it exists.

The dangers of this use came to slap me in the face just recently when I found out about the death of a friend, Morgan. For those of you that knew her, she was a charming firecracker of a girl. And I do not mean this to be a panegyric for her. This is more of a remembrance of a good person that fought and lost a difficult battle. She wasn’t perfect. She was messy, disorganized, and often forgetful. But more than that she was caring, kind, and loyal. We had not known each other long but I sincerely hope she is at peace.

One of the most surprising elements of working in this industry is the strong sense of community. It was wholly unexpected on my part. Since I was working primarily under the radar for the first months I was here, I didn’t really get a feel for it until I put up my website and, well, broadened my horizons, so to speak.

Just about a week ago I met up with Alice Carroll (www.aliceinbodyland.com) for tea and gossip at one of our favorite spots that is conveniently located smack dab between our incalls. Sunday I went kayaking with Chloe May (www.chloemay.net). She is just the sweetest princess. I got a call from Ariel Capri (www.divadivine.net) on Monday during which she referred me a client. He is one of her regulars but since she is in LA right now, I had the pleasure of making his acquaintance. On Monday evening I went to a potluck at Veronica Lake’s (www.loveveronicalake.com) house that included Gretchen, Bella, Allie, and several other girls (I bet there are a few of you out there that would have killed for an invite to that event which was a bit… wilder than your traditional potluck). Today I received an email from Larrissa (www.lovelylarissa.com) warning about an unfortunate incident she had with a client and reminding us all to stay safe.

The downside to being in this industry is that not many outside of it can relate to the particular pleasures and stresses of this line of work. It has been an incredible experience to be welcomed so warmly by so many of my lovely colleagues.

What a very exciting week this has been and it’s only Tuesday! Thus far, two very interesting things have occurred. First, I received my first review on TER. For those interested in reading it, please check it out here:

http://www.theeroticreview.com/reviews/show.asp?id=256272

It is very helpful reading for anyone interested in meeting with me as it includes a fairly comprehensive list of the services of I offer. As well as those that I don’t… It was written by one of my very first clients ever in Seattle. He is a gentleman that knows me well and whom I absolutely adore. After reading the review myself, I feel it is quite accurate and should definitely be viewed by anyone interested in scheduling time with me.

Second, I posted my first Eros ad. This is my first foray into really “putting myself out there” and I have had a terrific response. If you have responded to the ad but not heard back from me, please be patient. As I have mentioned before, my time is limited and the response has been greater than I could ever have anticipated. Given that I see very few clients per week and everyone needs to be screened, etc. I am working my way through emails as quickly as time allows.

In the weeks to come I anticipate more exciting news will be forthcoming so pleased do stay tuned. xo-sol